title of web site: postcards from the pug bus
 
the alt-right's favorite satire site
image of an 8 ball Home   Ass Hats   Blog   Celebrities   Fashion   Lifestyle   Music   News   Politics   Religion   Sports   Technology   Our Staff   image of an 8 ball

Search This Site with Caitlyn
The World's First Transgender
Sanctuary City Search Engine

The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a powdery-smelling, dried-up, old-hag English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive. Visit The Grammar Prick

Deplorably Speaking
Herein your fearless editor in briefs, who was deplorable long before deplorable was a meme, holds forth, but seldom holds his tongue, on a variety of topics ranging from the politicalization of sports to the emasculation of male college students to the idiocies of third-wave feminism to the reasons for the sudden prominence of white-interest™ movements to whatever fickles his nancy. You can check in any time you like, but come prepared to stay. Previous topics include, but are not limited to:
Sticking It to The Military-Athletic Complex
Stay the Fuck Home, Mick Jagger
Never Look a Gift Pussy in the Mouth

Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website is available from Cedar Tree Books. Written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.

Sample chapters . . . -1- -2-


Free the Music
wipe out the riaa printed ona roll of toilet paperStrike a blow for freedom. Download music on the down low today. You can't beat the price. Get the skinny at Zeropaid.


Humor Feed Banner

image of a gun

Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous and frightening to mention.

Angelina Jolie Offended by Virgin Mary Wal-Mart Painting
Jan 7, 2007 - 4:07
an image
LOS ANGELES - Angelina Jolie is offended by a painting that depicts her as the Virgin Mary hovering in a cloud over a Wal-Mart checkout line. The painting, called "Twelve Items or Less," was executed by Kate Kretz, an obscure North Carolina artist best known until now for her painting of Richard Petty hovering in a cloud over the infield at Dover Downs Raceway.

The painting—acrylic and oil on linen—depicts an angelic Jolie walking on clouds, holding her newborn daughter, Shiloh. Meanwhile, her adopted children, Maddox and Zahara, stand at either side of her, clutching her virgin blue gown. The older children are naked but for their wings. Below the holy trinity is a Wal-Mart checkout line.

"The painting is laughable," said Ms. Jolie. "I've seen better 'art' for sale at gas stations or on those holy cards they give away at viewings. I bet the 'artist' does a mean picture of Jesus—you know, the kind where his eyes seem to follow you around the room."

Ms. Jolie's major complaint, however, is with the setting of "Twelve Items or Less."

"I've never been inside a Wal-Mart in my life," she sniffed. "I don't believe in supporting companies that depress wages artificially, exploit women, and drive out local competition. If that woman had painted me in a more representative setting—an orphanage in Calcutta or a workers' co-op in Costa Rica—I wouldn't have minded, but Wal-Mart? Give me a break."

an image
Twelve Items or Less
While nobody has defended "Twelve Items or Less" as fine art, at least one observer thinks Ms. Jolie doth protest too much.

"Maybe Angelina doesn't shop in Wal-Mart," said Dr. Phil McGraw, "but a lot of her fan base does. Besides I think there are other issues at work here. Ms. Jolie certainly gives evidence of suffering from a chronic case of Madonna with Child Syndrome. The woman has not appeared in public without a baby on board in a long time.

"Obviously there is some deep-seated psychological need driving her behavior. I find it highly significant that as soon as Ms. Jolie finally let her adopted son, Maddox, walk on his own at the advanced age of four years, she adopted an infant girl and then had a backup baby of her own for good measure. Perhaps she doesn't like the painting because it hits too close to home."

Artist Kate Kretz, for her part, seems surprised at all the attention her painting has attracted. She told Popular Art magazine she is sorry if Ms. Jolie "doesn't get it." She also revealed that she wasn't going to let public reaction keep her from starting work on her next painting—Britney Spears and her two sons standing in a cloud over the food court in a California mall. After that she said she plans to return to her other loves, hair embroideries and psychological clothing.

In related news, Twelve Items or Less can be purchased for $50,000 through Chelsea Galleria in Miami, which represents Ms. Kretz.


More Articles by This Author

© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked. Have a secular day.


Feeling Lucky, Punk?
image of gun with one bullet left in the chamber Many people know that certain gemstones, power phrases, and colors are associated with different signs of the zodiac. Only the true stargazer understands, however, the relationships among small appliances and zodiac signs. If you're always a few nachos short of a grande, you should open your mind to the voice of the small appliance that rules your universe—especially if that appliance is hissing or emiting sparks.
Sagittarius (11/22 - 12/21): Although panic and campaign buttons aren't standard equipment on most Chef John blenders, yours is equipped with them. You will need the panic button when the candidate you support in a school board election is caught on a live mic calling the head of the school board a cunt.
Capricorn (12/22 - 1/19): Be the envy of the zodiac with your Elvis Presley Solar-Powered Walking Stick and Eight-Track Flashback. The Gladys model doubles as a dowser that shimmies whenever an Elvis sighting is immanent, say, at a Popeyes or Krispy Kremes.
Aquarius (1/20 - 2/18): Thanks to the Quentin Tarentino Home Movie Splicer there's no need for cats to suck the breath out of babies any more. Now you can edit the little crumb snatchers out of home movies and replace them with cartoon monsters.
Pisces (2/19 - 3/20): Behind every successful Pisces there's a steam iron. George Washington, for example, used a crude form of a steam iron to press his uniform before posing for that famous photo op of him crossing the Delaware. Unfortunately, there wasn't time for the other men in the photo to borrow Washington's iron.
Aries (3/21 - 4/19): Your fastidiousness and passion for order are governed by the Sterile-matic Continuous-Clean Toaster. Unlike most people, whose toaster pans contain calcified nuggets with the mineral properties of fertilizer, your Sterile-matic and, by extension, your life are gleaming monuments to civility.
Taurus (4/20 - 5/20): The constellation Amana passing through the House of Proctor and Gamble designates the crockpot as your ruling small appliance. Unfortunately, the crockpot signifies both the pleasure of cooking for a family and the loneliness of the mechanized meal. Heads you win, tails you eat alone.
Gemini (5/21 - 6/21): The Katy Perry iPod rocks the Gemini world with high-production-values sensitivity. An 8-gigabyte memory is standard equipment on this gem, so no matter how often your muse comes singing in the mist, there will always be room for the rhymes she inspires.
Cancer (6/22 - 7/22): Cancerians owe their clear skin to the Digital Electronic Cold Sore Eliminator. Blind dates, important job interviews, appearances in police lineups—with the Electronic Zit Remover you can make a smooth appearance whatever the occasion. Those walking STD incubators Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer swear by theirs. You will, too.
Leo (7/23 - 8/22): Portable, battery-operated desk fans are associated with many influential persons. No matter what your Leo body type—Mick Jagger, Arnold Schwarzenegger, or Mae West—a desk fan can help to keep you cool. Mick never leaves home, his own or his latest model friend's, without his.
Virgo (8/23 - 9/22): Your ruling cosmic appliance—a Dual-Action Reading Light and Self-Cleaning Fish Scaler—will become exceedingly scarce and valuable after it is demonstrated by Martha Stewart on a shopping channel segment sponsored by the National Organization of Women.
Libra (9/23 - 10/23): David Chang Electronic Chopsticks-Cum-Knitting Needles are the perfect appliance for Librans on the go. Why overdose on greasy wontons and calory-laden duck sauce when you can knit one and purl two while you're waiting for your steamed selections from column A and column B to arrive.
Scorpio (10/24 - 11/21): The Lidia Bastianich Air Freshener and Pasta Maker satisfies your passion for practicality. You can prepare dinner without worrying that your tricolored tortellini will be compromised by litter box odor while you try to impress that important family member or friend.

The Gift of GAB
image of GAB avatarFuck those Twitter girly men and pearl clutchers. They banned all the cool kids like Milo, so all the cool kids are matriculating to GAB, where free spech matters.
Contact Us or Else
image of a beat up, rusty old mailboxHey, Skippy. Here's your big chance. Let us know what you think or if you think. You know you want to. Go ahead. We dare you. We might even print your stinking letter. Send email to Pug Bus Editor


Back by Unpopular Demand
Read any three articles, get the fourth one free!
NFL to Install 200 Gender-Appropriate Bathrooms for Super Bowl LI
Windows 10 Officially Labeled Malware by NCSA
Taylor Swift Opens Anal Bleaching Salons
Pippa Middleton's Ass Not All It's Cracked Up to Be


There's a Saint for That
image of a saint, name unknownThere's a saint for that, whatever "that" might be. Just click where it hurts you to find out which board-certified saint to call. Breast Implants, burn marks from the grill,, hemorrhoids, and more.


The Pug Bus Interview
phil maggitti smoking a joint, isn't that shocking now?Smoke 'em if you got 'em, then enjoy the interviews nobody else has the balls to do. We're not just blowing smoke. Our fearless interviewer isn't afraid to stop totally at the surface.Read on.


Shortcuts to Good Karma
yin-yang symbolShit happens, but good karma is no accident. You can appear worthy even when you're being a dick if you learn to avoid the mistakes that others have made.Read on.



© Copyright 2007 by YourSite.com