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Numbers That Wag the Dog
Jews as % of U.S. Population . . . 2.2
Source: Jewish Virtual Library

Gays, Lesbians, Bisexuals as % of U.S. Population . . . 2.3
Source: NHIS data in the Washington Post

Persons with Celiac disease as % of U.S. population: 1
Source: Food Republic

Persons who follow a gluten-free diet, despite not having celiac, as a % of U.S. population: 3
Source: National Foundation for Celiac Awareness

Percent of these people who are deluding themselves: 100
Source: The Pug Bus

Official Carly Fiorina
C-Bomb Counter™
The Donald was right: Who could vote for that mug? Imagine seeing that cowpie with eyes on the front page of your newspaper in the morning. The only thing worse would be seeing that cowpie with eyes in your bed in the morning. She's a two-bagger, for sure. She's also a devout foe of the word cunt, though she gives every appearance of being one.Indeed,a source close to the Fiorina campaign revealed recently that if old grumblemug gets elected, she'll make the use of that word in any public space a felony. Thus we feel obliged to introduce the Official Carly Fiorina C-Bomb Counter, which reports the number of times the C-Bomb has been used any place in America since you landed on this page. (Figures do not include uses by Donald Trump, who calls women cunts all the time.)

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Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website is available from Cedar Tree Books. Written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.
Sample chapters . . . -1-  -2-

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Yanni Arrested for Alleged Musical Abuse-Apartments
Mar 7, 2006 - 8:32
an image
Yanni then.
MANALAPAN, Fla. - The musician Yanni was arrested at his home Friday after allegedly subjecting a woman to musical abuse, authorities said. Mr. Yanni, whose legal name is John Yanni Christopher, faces a domestic-battery-by-music charge, according to a police report. The Greek-born singer-pianist, 51, denied the allegation.

According to Mr. Yanni's companion Silvia Barthes, 33, Mr. Yanni woke up Friday morning and began playing one of his albums. Apart from the "rather loud volume for that time of day," Ms. Barthes said she did not find anything unusual in Mr. Yanni's actions.

"He always listens to his own music when he wants to make love to me," she told police. "Otherwise he has difficulty performing. So I just thought he was giving me a wake-up call."

On Friday, however, Mr. Yanni was not in the mood for love, unless he had self-love in mind. By noon he had listened to Niki Nana (1989), Reflections of Passion (1990), Out of Silence (1990), Optimystique (1990), Keys to Imagination (1990), Chameleon Days (1990), and In Celebration of Life (1991). Ms. Barthes told police she had begun to fear that Mr. Yanni intended to listen to his entire thirty-album oeuvre in sequence.

an image
Yanni now.
"I tried to tune the music out," said Ms. Barthes, "but Yanni has speakers in every room of the house, and he controls them from a master panel in a locked closet. I went out to the pool for a swim, but he turned on the outside speakers. I was on the verge of a panic attack. There's only so much Yanni a person can take."

By late Friday afternoon Mr. Yanni had changed into his performance clothes and had worked his way up to Yanni-Greatest Hits (1997). At that point Ms. Barthes finally asked him "to please give it a rest."

After a protracted argument, Mr. Yanni turned up the volume, Ms. Barthes claimed. When she attempted to leave the beach-
front house, Mr. Yanni seized her by the arm and forced her into a spare bedroom. There he shook her, threw her on the bed, and jumped on top of her, according to the police report.

While Tribute (1997) played loudly, Mr. Yanni sat astride Ms. Barthes, waving his arms manically as though he were conducting an orchestra. When he went to the guest bathroom during "intermission," Ms. Barthes summoned police on her cell phone.

When the police arrived, just as In the Mirror (1997) was beginning, Mr. Yanni claimed that Barthes had kicked him and, he believed, had injured his "conducting" finger during the incident.

Reporters who called a telephone listing for a John Christopher in Manalapan over the weekend heard a recorded message saying no one was available at the time. A selection from Nightbird (2002) played in the background.

Update: Although charges against Yanni were dropped eventually, the incident still angers many people--not because of anything Yanni did in his beds or in the recording studio, but because he owns a $7.7 million oceanfront home, instead in apartments.

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