Keith Richards Wants to Play Shrek's Father Next
May 18, 2007, 10:21
Keith Richards wears many hats.
HOLLYWOOD - Fresh from his appearance as Captain Jack Sparrow's father in the latest Pirates of the Caribbean, Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards says he wants to play Shrek's father in Shrek Four: The Donkey's Revenge because he doesn't want to wind up being typecast.
"Papa's got a brand new bag," snorted Mr. Richards in the library of his neo-Victorian Connecticut house, "but let's face it, who wants to play a spaced-out, ragamuffin drunk all the time?"
Such is Mr. Richards' fear of being typecast that he has informed Pirates star, Johnny Depp, that he doesn't want to be included in Pirates four, five, and six.
"Johnny took it hard," laughed Mr. Richards. "Bloke looks up to me, ya know; but I told 'im, I sez, 'Johnny, I gotta have room to stretch.'
"Besides, in cartoon films you don't have to spend all that time in make up, you don't have to memorize your lines, and nobody has a shit fit if you turn up for work with a drink in your hand."
A source close to the Shrek production team said that writers have been asked to create Shrek's father, who has never appeared in any of the three Shrek movies.
"It'll be a challenge, but we're thinking it'd be cool if Shrek's father was this famous, bad-boy musician who meets Shrek after playing a gig at Shrek's castle and discovers that Shrek is one of his many sons."
In other news, Britney Spears has appeared topless on her website to thank her fans for all their prayers, which begs the question: whose prayers was she acknowledging when she appeared in public without her knickers several months back.
