Home   Ass Hat Awards   Celebrities   Fashion   Lifestyle   Music   News   Politics   Religion   Sports   Technology   Our Staff   Contact
Search This Site

Your Daily Horoscope
(Ramp Accessible)
Because you are highly possessive, adore your own company, and are inclined to mate for life, you begin a campaign to have self-sex marriages legalized. Your slogan, "Be part of the problem and part of the solution at the same time," is too clever by half, and your campaign comes to grief when you are caught making an unauthorized deposit at a sperm bank.

The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a powdery, old-hag English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive. Visit The Grammar Prick
Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website is available from Cedar Tree Books. Written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any nightstand.
Sample chapters . . . -1-  -2-


Humor Feed Banner

Madonna Recovering Accent after Riding Fall
Aug 17, 2005 - 9:18
an image
TOLLARD ROYAL - Lady Madonna Louise Ciccone is recovering her British accent "quite nicely, thank you," said a spokeswoman for the American singer turned faux aristocrat.

Lady Madonna temporarily lost her accent—in addition to cracking three ribs and breaking her collarbone and her hand—when she fell while riding on the 1,200-acre grounds of Ashcombe House, her country residence in the village of Tollard Royal on the Wiltshire-Dorset border. Lady Madonna, who turned forty-seven yesterday, was attempting to post the trot around a corner when her cell phone rang, causing her pony to break into a gallop.

Doctors feared the singer had suffered a concussion because she was cursing mightily in a lower-middle-class American accent when she arrived in hospital.

"Her accent and vocabulary choices were indicative of a concussion, which often causes a person to revert to type linguistically," said Trevor Bidwell, MB BChir, in clipped upper-class tones.

Based on that diagnosis, Dr. Bidwell thought Lady Madonna should he held overnight for observation. When she was taken to a private suite usually reserved for members of the royal family, however, Lady Madonna exclaimed, "I'm right chuffed to be in such a posh setting."

"We knew then we were out of the woods," said Dr. Bidwell. "We decided that the best thing for Lady Madonna's accent was bed rest and the two Bridget Jones movies."

Lady Madonna acquired a British accent several years ago shortly after she had begun dating Guy Ritchie, director of the hit London gangster movie Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. Although their movie collaboration Swept Away is considered one of the worst movies ever made, Lady Madonna's British accent has been somewhat better received by her neighbors in Tollard Royal.



top-of-page link   top of page    teensy, tiny image of printer  printer friendly page

 

Follow the Pug Bus on Twitter
or we'll follow your ass home.

Back by Unpopular Demand

There's a Saint for That
image of a saint, name unknown There's a saint for that, whatever "that" might be. Just click where it hurts you to find out which board-certified saint to call. Breast Implants, burn marks from the grill,, hemorrhoids, and more.
The Pug Bus Interview
phil maggitti smoking a joint, isn't that shocking now?Smoke 'em if you got 'em, then enjoy the interviews nobody else has the stones to do. We're not just blowing smoke. Our fearless interviewer isn't afraid to stop totally at the surface.Read on.
Shortcuts to Good Karma
yin-yang symbolStuff happens, but good karma is no accident. You can appear worthy even when you're being a dick if you learn to avoid the mistakes that others have made.Read on.
Free the Music
wipe out the riaa printed on a roll of toilet paperStrike a blow for freedom. Download music on the down low today. You can't beat the price. Get the skinny at Zeropaid.


Sites for Sore Eyes
image of tj eckleburg's eyes from the great gatsby American Atheists, High Times, Pirate Bay, Soulseek, Spectrum Labs, Vaults of Erowid, WiTopia