Home   Ass Hat Awards   Celebrities   Fashion   Lifestyle   Music   News   Politics   Religion   Sports   Technology   Our Staff   Contact
Your Almost Daily Horoscope
(Ramp Accessible)
You suffer from automonosis—the tendency to become bored with your own company. If you need to get away from yourself, here's a tip: you don't have to die in order to be reincarnated. People who don't like themselves often find happiness when they become somebody else. Companies that advertise in the backs of magazines are ready to assist in this transformation. If there are compelling personal reasons for not changing your identity, perhaps a trip to a spa for a simple makeover will do the trick.
More Horoscopes
The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a powdery, old-hag English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive.
Visit The Grammar Prick
Postcards the Book
Cover of the book Postcards from the Pug Bus.The book that inspired a website is available from Cedar Tree Books. Written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any mailbox. Sample chapters:
1 2
Free the Music
screw the riaaStrike a blow for freedom.
Download music today.
You can't beat the price.
Get the skinny at Zeropaid.
Humor Feed Banner
 
Donald Trump, Rosie O'Donnell Agree to Sit and Spin
Dec 25, 2006, 07:57
an image
NEW YORK - Just when there appeared to be no foreseeable let up in the Donald Trump-Rosie O'Donnell feuding frenzy, came a Christmas miracle shocker: the announcement that the terrible twosome would soon be staring in their own NBC sitcom.

Apparently the peacock network sees primetime magic in Donald's campaign to take some money out of "Rosie's fat-ass pockets"—and Nielsen gold in Rosie's mocking imitation of Trump's combover

According to NBC's press release: "Not since Sam and Diane, Lucy and Ricky, or Wilbur and Mr. Ed has there been so much chemistry on screen. It's like nuclear fission in your TV tube! We feel that the Trump-O'Donnell sparing and repartee make them the Nick and Nora Charles of today. Look for a smart, sophisticated, all-out laugh throwdown this spring when Rosie and Donald explode through your screen on Thursday nights."

The as yet unnamed vehicle will be centered around the classic "odd couple" premise as the two opposites find themselves forced together under circumstances beyond their control. He's a high-powered billionaire investor; she's a daytime talk show spitfire. When both are surprisingly given joint custody of a bevy of beautiful and rowdy pageant queens, there are a lot of lessons, laughter, and lingerie to be shared.

an image
Says one top TV exec, "Think of it as Felix and Oscar teaching the Facts of Life."

And just how did the network get The Donald and The O'Donnell to declare a ceasefire?

Sources say that Barbara Walters was mostly responsible for the idea. Ms. Walters ran into Paris Hilton when they both showed up to post bail for Nicole Ritchie. The three got to talking about how the Hilton-Ritchie feud was a Simple Life boost, and Barbara had a clear 20/20 view to ratings treasure.

She spoke with each of the feuding stars, convincing Donald that with sales of Trump water waning, this was the perfect post-Apprentice vehicle. With Rosie, she simply mentioned the bathing beauty pageant queens. Within twenty-four hours, both were on board

Although the show is still without a confirmed title, word on the street is that NBC has rejected Butch Sassy and the Lawsuit Kid in favor of what is sure to be the catchphrase on everyone's lips come summer: Sit and Spin.

Amused? Disgusted? Royally pissed off? Click the Twitter link to share with a friend. Go ahead. It's free.

top-of-page link  top of page  teensy, tiny image of stamped envelope  e-mail this article  teensy, tiny image of printer  printer friendly page

© The fine print: the editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously.

 
twitter icon for linking purposes
Follow the Pug Bus
or it will follow you home.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

Joe Paterno image

Former Penn State football coach Joe Paterno did not die of a broken heart, as many of his delusional followers are claiming. He died of a guilty conscience. Anybody who says otherwise is a toadying douchebag.