Your Daily Horoscope
(Ramp Accessible)
You will have a strange dream in which you see a giant field of sunflowers in the distance. As you race toward the field in slow motion, you begin to hear a sound coming from the sunflowers. When you reach the field, you discover that the sunflowers have the faces of The Village People, and they're singing "YMCA."
screw the riaaStrike a blow for freedom. Download music today.
Humor Feed Banner
 
Paul McCartney, Iraq War, Mystery Sculpture Top News Headlines
Mar 19, 2008, 17:19
an image
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Paul McCartney is rid of Heather Mills and $49.8 million; the War in Iraq is five years old and isn’t toilet trained yet; the Houston Rockets winning streak blew up in their hands; but the big news today is the appearance of a mystery sculpture on the Postcards from the Pug Bus compound near West Chester, Pennsylvania.

Astonished local residents walking past the 1.2-acre compound near the West Chester University campus were divided on what the large sculpture represents.

“It looks like a cross between an Afghan hound in heat and a Tennessee walking horse with a stick up its ass,” said Jon Keslowski, a phys major.

“It’s a dead ringer for Chelsea Clinton,” said another observer who asked not to be identified.

Phil Maggitti, editor in briefs of Postcards from the Pug Bus, told reporters, “At first we thought the sumbitch had escaped from Burning Man. Then we figured some damn elementary school class had sneaked onto the compound overnight Sunday and put up another memorial to Barbaro. They're all over this area, and before you can say "who gives a shit," it will be Kentucky Derby time again.”

Mr. Maggitti said he had no plans to remove the sculpture, though he would entertain offers for it.

"If somebody's looking to trade his kingdom for a horse, we've got just the thing for him."




top-of-page link  top of page  teensy, tiny image of stamped envelope  e-mail this article  teensy, tiny image of printer  printer friendly page


© The fine print: the editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously.