Britney Spears, Kevin Federline Sex Video Details
Nov 11, 2006, 13:02
WEST CHESTER, Penna. - Snippets of a sex video purportedly made by Britney Spears and her estranged husband, Kevin Federline, are popping up on various adult websites. The alleged master video from which these snippets were taken was made sometime between the couple's wedding ceremony on September 18, 2004, and the date they were married legally, October 6, 2004.
In one grainy, nineteen-second clip a woman in a shiny dark wig goes down on a seedy-looking man in a wife beater and a New York Yankees baseball cap cocked sideways. This clip appeared on PornoTube, an adult video-sharing website. Another clip, this one twenty-nine seconds long, has been posted on UpYourTube. In the latter clip the gentleman in the New York Yankees cap appears to be eating Doritos® off a woman's left buttock.
Rumors about a Spears-Federline sex video began circulating last year after members of the couple's entourage allegedly threatened to release copies of the video. Ms. Spears was so incensed by the rumors that she sued US Weekly for defamation of character for printing them. A judge dismissed her suit, however, saying essentially that Ms. Spears' public behavior left her with no character to defame.
With several snippets of Britney Spears getting toxic with Mr. Federline currently available online—and with more certainly to follow, perhaps even the full-blown, four-hour marathon we've been hearing about—two questions present themselves: Did Mr. Federline leak the snatches of video in order to obtain a measure of revenge after receiving a text message from Ms. Spears that read, "f u dickhd i wanna dvrce"? More importantly, how can a viewer tell if said video snatch is legitimate?
We asked Biff Scuzzy, our adult and child pornog- raphy evaluator, to provide our readers with clues. According to Mr. Scuzzy, you might be watching the legitimate Spears-Federline sex video if . . .
Kevin lies there letting Britney do all the work. She asks him to pull her finger afterward. The Chihuahua keeps scratching at the door trying to get out of the room. She manages to swallow without swallowing her gum.
Her wig falls off during dismount. He complains about getting pork rind crumbs in his crack. He rolls over afterward, pulls his pants up, and heads for Las Vegas with his posse. Her cousins sleeping in the other bed in the room complain about all the noise.
She says she wants to try "the missionary's position." He offers to rap dirty to her. They're lying on top of the covers. They re-use the condom
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