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Rosie O'Donnell Replaced by Don Imus on The View
Apr 25, 2007, 16:36
NEW YORK - Rosie O'Donnell is giving her seat on The View to Don Imus as of June 1, a source close to the show said this morning. The move, which promises to be the most talked about development in television since the Katie Couric Photoshopped-image scandal, caught critics with their laptops down.
"Nobody saw that one coming," said Gail Sister of the Philadelphia Inquirer. "Everybody figured Donald Trump would have Rosie knee-capped eventually, and Don Imus would either wind up on satellite or in rehab, or both."
The cantankerous Ms. O'Donnell, who feuded with Mr. Trump and verbally maced Kelly Ripa, American Idol judge Paula Abdul, and newspaper tycoon Rupert Murdoch during her brief tenure on The View, is reported to be leaving the show because she was unable to agree on a new contract with ABC.
Mr. Trump, however, told the Fox News Channel yesterday that Ms. O'Donnell had been fired "for being a royal pain in the ass, and with an ass as big as hers, that's a lot of pain."
Despite Ms. O'Donnell's penchant for starting trouble and for reputedly causing host Barbara Walters to wear a mouth guard to keep from grinding her teeth in her sleep, Ms. O'Donnell was credited with boosting The View's ratings. Indeed during February sweeps the show's audience was up 15 percent in key women demographics compared to the same period in 2006.
The desire to consolidate those gains—and to maintain The View's editorial edge—led ABC to approach Mr. Imus, who was fired by NBC after he had referred to the Rutgers women's basketball team as "nappy-headed hos."
"ABC needed someone with a huge pair of coconuts to fill the hole left by Rosie," said the network source. "Besides, Don's still popular with men in the eighteen-to-thirty-five bracket, which hasn't been a particularly strong segment among The View's audience."
No matter how tight the fit between Mr. Imus and ABC, many television industry insiders do not expect him to remain on the show for long.
"The View simply gives Don Imus a chance to complete his penance in public," said Gail Sister. "He's using women again just like he always has, and as soon as he figures he's repaired his reputation, he'll go back to radio."
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Former Penn State football coach Joe Paterno did not die of a broken heart, as many of his delusional followers are claiming. He died of a guilty conscience. Anybody who says otherwise is a toadying douchebag.
You suffer from automonosis—the tendency to become bored with your own company. If you need to get away from yourself, here's a tip: you don't have to die in order to be reincarnated. People who don't like themselves often find happiness when they become somebody else. Companies that advertise in the backs of magazines are ready to assist in this transformation. If there are compelling personal reasons for not changing your identity, perhaps a trip to a spa for a simple makeover will do the trick.
Meaner than a powdery, old-hag English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive.
The book that inspired a website is available from Cedar Tree Books. Written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any mailbox. Sample chapters:
Strike a blow for freedom.
