Your Seldom Daily Horoscope
(Ramp Accessible)
 Your sun is in arrears and your moon is in contempt. Ordinarily this would mean that you should be incognito, but these are not ordinary times. The presence of the planet Dipthong in your literary house and the emergence of the Ringo star in your musical constellation point to the need for the bold initiative instead. Remember, the grand gesture is the prelude to grand success. Think large, live large, and-as Lane Bryant is my judge-large will be your shadow on the world's stage.
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The Grammar Prick
 Meaner than a powdery, old-hag English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive.
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Postcards the Book
 The book that inspired a website is available from Cedar Tree Books. Written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any mailbox. Sample chapters: 1 2
Free the Music
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Taco Bell Wins Asshat Award
WEST CHESTER, Penna. -- We take no pleasure in bestowing this week's asshat award on Taco Bell, which recently bent over frontwards to accommodate a bunch of meddlesome old cunts of both sexes at the Center for Science in the Public Interest (CSPI).
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Jan 29, 2013, 12:52
Asshats of the Week to Everyone Who Supports Joe Paterno
WEST CHESTER, Penna. - The Amalgamated Asshat Association will have to step up production this week in order to make enough asshats for all the Joe Paterno enablers who have earned one.
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Nov 13, 2011, 11:26
Representative Lamar Smith Is the Ass Hat of the Week
WEST CHESTER, Penna. - Lamar Smith, chairman of the House of Representatives Judiciary Committee, is the latest winner of the Postcards from the Pug Bug Ass Hat of the Week Award. Mr. Smith (R-Texas) earned this highly influential prize by sponsoring a bill that encapsulates all that is cynical, imperialistic, and reprehensible about the attitudes of too many residents of these self-important United States.
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Oct 8, 2011, 11:16
Pretty Woman, Julia Roberts, Hooker-Kid Mom Is Ass Hat of the Week
HOLLYWOOD, Calif. - What sort of dipshit thinks it's "hysterically funny" to dress her three-year-old daughter as a hooker and shove her onstage before a nationwide television audience on something called Toddlers & Tiaras? How fucked in the head, how worthless in your own mind do you have to be to get off on using a little kid like that? You're almost giving pedophilia a good name. We bet there was nary a dry keyboard among the watch-and-wank set that night.
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Sep 9, 2011, 12:52
Hillary's Gal Pal Elton Is Ass Hat of the Week
WEST CHESTER, Penna. -- Hillary Clinton's gal pal Elton John is the latest recipient of the Postcards from the Pug Bus Ass Hat of the Week award.
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Apr 11, 2008, 06:26
Michael Vick Homies Win Ass Hat of the Week Award
NEW YORK - While Michael Vick sits in jail trying to master the intricacies of checkers and the ins and outs of prison dating etiquette, he will surely take comfort in knowing that five of his most loyal homies have won the Ass Hat of the Week Award.
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Dec 18, 2007, 11:32
Ellen DeGeneres Wins Ass Hat Award for Dog Speech
LOS ANGELES - Ellen DeGeneres is the newest winner of the Postcards from the Pug Bus Ass Hat award. Ms. DeGeneres, 49, copped the prestigious award for using the bully pulpit of her television chat show to put a self-serving spin on her disregard of an agreement she had signed with a pet rescue agency.
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Oct 17, 2007, 12:40
Steve Irwin, Brad Pitt, George Bush Get First Ass Hat Awards
WEST CHESTER, Penna. - Steve Irwin, famously known as the crocodile hunter; Brad Pitt, better known as Angelina Jolie's bitch; and George W. Bush, often known as "numbnuts," are the winners of the first Postcards from the Pug Bus Ass Hat awards. Ordinarily there will be only one asshat award per customer, but this time we were spoilt for choice.
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Sep 4, 2007, 07:29
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© The fine print: the editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously.
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The Fuck It List
Ten Things You Should Flip the Bird to Before You Die
1. Religion
2. Voting
3. Seat Belts
4. Facebook
5. Paying for Music and Movies
6. The Bucket List
7. Classical Music
8. Pissing Indoors All the Time
9. Hats
10. Going to Bed Early.
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