Your Daily Horoscope
(Ramp Accessible)
You will have a strange dream in which you see a giant field of sunflowers in the distance. As you race toward the field in slow motion, you begin to hear a sound coming from the sunflowers. When you reach the field, you discover that the sunflowers have the faces of The Village People, and they're singing "YMCA."
cover of pug bus book

Postcards from the Pug Bus, the book that inspired a website, is now available from Cedar Tree Books. Click here to read a sample chapter.
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Chinese Restaurant Suspected of Fortune Cookie Fraud
WEST CHESTER, Penna. - A popular Chinese restaurant in this university town is suspected of manipulating fortune cookies in order to lure customers into purchasing more expensive items. More.
Oct 26, 2009, 05:43


Three Second Rule Extended During Recession
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The federal three-second guideline, which cautions people against picking up food and eating it more than three seconds after it has been dropped, will be extended to six seconds for the remainder of the current recession, according to a U.S. Department of Agriculture spokesperson. More.
Mar 25, 2009, 12:50


Nation’s Largest Sperm Banks Seek Bailout
LOS ANGELES – AIG (Alternative Insemination Group) and Semen Brothers, the nation’s two largest sperm banks, say they cannot come close to meeting financial obligations without a sizable infusion of money from Washington. More.
Mar 18, 2009, 09:14


Dallas Area Mortgage Broker Stuns Seminar with Revelation
DALLAS - According to reports, more than one hundred mortgage professionals were horrified when area mortgage broker, Louise Pennington, publicly claimed that her motivation for originating small commercial loans was the potential to earn large sums of money. More.
Dec 30, 2008, 12:21


Proposition 8 Could Make California a Haven for Gay Couples
SACRAMENTO, Calif. – The approval of Proposition 8, the so-called gay marriage ban, in California has turned the Golden State into a haven for gay couples. Thousands of same-sex partners from across the United States and Canada are pouring into California, seeking refuge from the pitfalls of heterosexual-style marriage. More.
Nov 13, 2008, 15:18


Starbucks to Open First Port-o-Cup Outlet
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – The Starbucks corporation announced yesterday that it will open it’s first Port-o-Cup™ outlet in West Chester, Pennsylvania, on the Postcards from the Pug Bus compound, where a mysterious horselike sculpture appeared recently. More.
Mar 23, 2008, 12:17


Writers Strike Cripples Celebrity Satire, Sex Video Website
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – The three-month-old Writer’s Guild of America (WGA) strike has flattened the tires of Postcards from the Pug Bus, southeastern Pennsylvania’s leading celebrity satire website. More.
Jan 28, 2008, 11:10


Mall Shooting Rampage Inspires Shopping Insurance
WILMINGTON, Del. – The Westroads Mall in Omaha, Nebraska, where a frustrated shopper gunned down nine people yesterday, has inspired First State merchants to create Shoppers Hourly Insurance Terms (SHIT). More.
Dec 6, 2007, 11:03


Preppy Killer Says Rough Sex with Gal Pal Led to Coke Bust
NEW YORK – Robert Chambers Jr., whom you may remember as the “Preppy Killer,” told police last night that the drugs found in the apartment he shares with his long-time companion, Shawn Kovell, belong to Ms. Kovell. More.
Oct 23, 2007, 20:26


Michel Martin Is Today's Michael Vick Tool
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Today’s dumb-ass Michael Vick sympathizer is Michel Martin, hostess of Tell Me More, a one-hour daily NPR news talk show. More.
Aug 25, 2007, 12:08

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