Your Seldom Daily Horoscope
Your sun is in arrears and your moon is in contempt. Ordinarily this would mean that you should be incognito, but these are not ordinary times. The presence of the planet Dipthong in your literary house and the emergence of the Ringo star in your musical constellation point to the need for the bold initiative instead. Remember, the grand gesture is the prelude to grand success. Think large, live large, and-as Lane Bryant is my judge-large will be your shadow on the world's stage.
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The Grammar Prick
Meaner than a powdery, old-hag English teacher, The Grammar Prick will split your head if you split an infinitive.
Postcards the Book
The book that inspired a website is available from Cedar Tree Books. Written by someone who was actually raised by pugs, Postcards is a welcome addition to any mailbox. Sample chapters:
Free the Music
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Mark Foley Biopic Doesn't Make Hilary Swank Horny
NEW YORK - November sweeps and midterm elections are fast approaching. Quicker than you can send your favorite page muffin a "how's it going, Stud?" instant message, the Lifetime Original Movie channel has rushed to cash in on the Mark Foley sex scandal.
Oct 20, 2006, 05:22
Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie Patch-Up Brokered by John Bolton
NEW YORK - Who says UN diplomacy doesn't work? Not recently reunited BFFs Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, says US ambassador to the United Nations, John Bolton, who brokered the reunion.
Oct 16, 2006, 06:14
Madonna, Angelina Jolie Set the Pace in Adoption Chic
PARIS - The hottest trends are in from the Spring 2007 catwalks, and Celebratty Chatter had front-row access to what is emerging as this season's must-have accessory, the African baby.
Oct 13, 2006, 06:55
North Korea Confirms Kim Jong-il's Sweet Sixteen Blast
PYONGYANG, North Korea - According to jet setters in this capital city of North Korea, the recent nuclear bombshell was not an act of aggression but the cool show-stopper of a totally awesome sweet sixteen party that Kim Jong-il threw to celebrate his sixteen years as North Korea's self-appointed Supreme Dear Leader.
Oct 11, 2006, 15:55
Tom Cruise Apology Was Perfect Hallmark Moment
LOS ANGELES - Looks like the Cruise control has been kicked in high gear, as Tom's team sees the Mission Impossible star's newfound gift of sincere sentiment as the perfect "Career, Take Two."
Sep 7, 2006, 08:02
Nicolas Cage Wicker Man Action Figure Hot at Pier 1
FORT WORTH, Texas - Reps for Nicolas Cage and Warner Bros. have woven a nifty new tie-in for the release of their latest film, a remake of the cult caper, The Wicker Man. Looks like Mr. Cage wants you to see his end of summer sizzler so much, he's willing to apply a little pier pressure.
Sep 5, 2006, 05:56
Katherine Heigl Rocks Emmy Red Carpet with Dripping Décolletage
Red-hot red carpet red alert! It might have been nearing triple digit heat at last week's primetime Emmys, but those va-va-voom vixens in their designer duds provided the real heat.
Sep 4, 2006, 06:03
Tom Cruise, Lindsay Lohan Teach Dame Judi Dench New Tricks
HOLLYWOOD - Note to Hollywood divas and divettes: those stuffy studio suits are saying it's time to tear out a page from Emily Post, and stop ending up on the Post's Page Six.
Aug 29, 2006, 07:13
Nicole Richie Grip on Reality Wearing Thin
HOLLYWOOD - With Nicole Richie's weight plunging lower than her necklines, every stargazer and enquiring mind wants to know what's going on with Nicole's never-ending weight loss story? The celebreality star, now reportedly down to 82 pounds, seems to be less concerned with promoting her show, The Simple Life, and more obsessed with avoiding complex carbs.
Aug 28, 2006, 06:39
Heidi Klum Gives Glamour to Guantanamo Bay
GUANTANAMO BAY, Cuba - Spoiler alert! What upcoming Project Runway challenge will have you totally held captive and ready to talk? Rumor has it our favorite primetime cable chic patrol will soon be heading south to help keep the fashionable at bay, Guantanamo bay, that is.
Aug 21, 2006, 07:00
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The Fuck It List
Ten Things You Should Flip the Bird to Before You Die
3. Seat Belts
5. Paying for Music and Movies
6. The Bucket List
7. Classical Music
8. Pissing Indoors All the Time
10. Going to Bed Early.